There are moments when I forget and there are moments when I doubt. I should NOT and yet, like that disciple, even having poked the finger in Jesus’ side, I still sometimes question.
Today is one of those days that God shows me that he does care.
In the morning I was feeling down and couldn’t but feel upset. Again I was not communicated information – they did not tell me that my class was cancelled. I don’t know if this is part of the famous ‘saving face’ or pure ignorance, but it simply makes me feel very controlled and unappreciated. All of the fancy dinners can’t really make up for that feeling.
In the afternoon, I decided to go out, do some shopping and take some pictures of the local streets for my art project (that I hopefully will start). I took the bike and wondered off in the streets for some photos until I started feeling hungry. Just on the corner was a small local bread bakery. I stopped for the pancake-looking-bread and asked for one piece. And oh my…the simple people there plainly melted the ice in my heart. The shopkeeper chose a freshly (still warm) pastry from the steamer just for me when there were tons of earlier made ones in the crates.
Then I tried to get going to the big shopping mall for other groceries. I was in a place I have never been before but because the city is laid out pretty simply, like the ones in the U.S., it is not very difficult to feel the general direction and get around. And it was still light. Somehow I don’t feel extremely excited to cycle at night (because I can’t really ask anyone for help.) (But I guess after TT in Venice, being totally exhausted, without sleep, living on adrenaline and still managing to get to places, I should feel a little bit more confident at my sense of direction.) Anyway, I took an off-beaten street that attracted my attention because of the beautiful tower on the corner. I cycled in and soon noticed even more decorative building. I got to the courtyard. (The building was not facing the street). And oh my…it was a church! With German words on the bulletin board. The building itself was fascinating – beautiful decorative with arches…and cross on top. A lady walked out and showing signs encouraged me to get inside. I put the bike and walked in. Immediately two ladies moved, said ‘hello’ and showed me to sit near them. Then we started talking. I thought it will be another – ‘oh you are foreigner-what you do here’ conversation. But not. They invited me to come to Christmas mass and hugged me. Just a day ago talking with Andy and then later exchanging messages with Victoria and Karolina, I realised how sad it was to not have Christmas. But God cares more for our spirit than we can care for ourselves. If it is not God, I can’t in any other way explain why I took that street and why before Christmas. Thank You, Lord, for your love!